I am Spartacus. Notorious Gladiator barred from Facebook.

Posted: January 25, 2011 in Uncategorized


Spartacus yesterday.

The ancient gladiator Spartacus has been told he cannot use his Facebook account because of an ever-increasing and deafening chorus of impersonators and imitators across the country all claiming to be the notorious slave leader. The widespread cries of, I am Spartacus!, have set the social networking site all a tis and has resulted in its chiefs accusing Spartacus of impersonating the famous and long dead namesake. Spartacus, who set up his account two years ago, said he was ” absolutely flabbergasted at the decision. My sword is drawn and I intend to contest this idiocy all the way, and to the death if need be.”

Facebook said it makes the occasional mistake and would seek to resolve the issue. The legendary freedom fighter went on to comment “I was quite shocked because I’d started writing an e-mail to all the Maedi people and went to press send and it came up to say I had to login. I then logged in and it came up to say I was a fake and my account had been disabled. For two thousand years I have struggled and fought on behalf of the oppressed and never have I encountered anything as stupendously dumb as this. They said I couldn’t use my name because I was impersonating someone famous, which I’m not, I am Spartacus.”

The put out Spartacus now waits to see if Facebook will reactivate his account.

Facebook said it reviewed thousands of pieces of useless, dull and crass content each day and conceded that even though the primary objective was to dry-suck every last ounse of information from every last citizen of the world for absolutely no cost whatsoever, they work hard to ensure the website remains a safe and trusted environment.


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